A Shortcut To Making Change: Piss People Off
January 19, 2011
Author 
In Most people walk on eggshells. They’re afraid to voice what they really think or do what will actually make change because, well, they don’t want to piss anyone off. They’re afraid of hurting someone’s feelings, maybe even getting fired by offering a divergent thought from a more senior team member or “the way things have always been done.”
But the truth is, as counter-intuitive as this sounds, you should absolutely say it. Especially if it is going to ruffle feathers. In fact, skip the talk: if you can go ahead and do something that might piss someone off but it’s in their interest – go for it. Some of the most dramatic (and positive) changes in the world required upsetting someone.
If your company is afraid to publish anything digitally, but you see a demand in the market – flesh out a strategy and just start doing it. Get the senior team out of their own way, they may even thank you for it later.
I was able to create a 6 figure Facebook fan page for a national brand before that brand thought Facebook was a good idea. In fact, that brand wasn’t doing anything in the social web. Now they have a full on strategy across channels, are putting sigificant budget behind it and integrated social in everything from POP to their national TV buys. I pissed a lot of people at that company off by executing despite being told “no,” especially their digital agency who didn’t think social media was a good idea. Funny, now their digital agency is managing the social presence for the brand (it’s a huge, well-known company, you know them).
But it’s not just spotting trends and putting them into action. It’s anything, in all aspects of life. Most people are afraid of change and to say it bluntly: need to be brought kicking and screaming into the future. Yet it’s way more fun to be the one doing that than always asking permission (which is in many cases too slow).
I’ve argued before not to be afraid of having opinions or taking sides, but I think you need to even go a step further than that. Never being afraid to upset someone. I actually respect the heck out of someone who will say something they consciously know will upset me but it’s the right consulting.
It’s not easy to do, but it’s exactly what you might need to.
Martin replied | Jan 19, 2011 (1 comment)
Sounds like “evolution by revolution” but it’s just being courageous, clever and sometimes not mainstream to start a conversation. If I had listened to some of my former colleagues, I would have never started my own personal brand. Today I know it was the right shortcut to making change. The company I am working for now saw the potential and the value of my change. Nice post!
Adam Singer replied | Jan 19, 2011 (552 comments)
Evolution by revolution – that’s good, dig it.
Catherine Lockey replied | Jan 19, 2011 (61 comments)
Playing along with something which is obviously stupid is becoming less and less beneficial thanks to social. Social empowers everyone. Old power and control management styles are still out there and intimidation is still used to attempt to “manage” others. This paradigm desperately needs to go by the wayside and your advice is one way to make it disappear. If it’s right and needed, take the initiative.
Once, sort of long ago, I was an educator at a school for former drop-outs run by a group of public schools. Students were failing their exit grammar test because we had no grammar curriculum in the school. I asked (mistake #1 ) if I could write one. The acting Superintendent paid my school a special visit, sat me down in a private room, and told me under no circumstances may I write a grammar curriculum. Only department heads were allowed to do this. Our school had no department heads and the superintendent obviously knew this. Ugh.
I wrote and published the curriculum anyway. Students passed their exit. They still use it today. Ridiculous, sad, and true. Playing along with obviously stupid rules isn’t going to change anything. If you’re a leader then don’t ask permission to be one. Just be yourself.
Adam Singer replied | Jan 19, 2011 (552 comments)
That’s a great story Catherine with a big lesson for all of us – thanks for sharing!
Iain Dooley replied | Jan 19, 2011 (1 comment)
It should be noted that bureaucracy can be an excellent form of quality control. Taking it upon yourself to decide that something is “in someone else’s best interests” pisses them off for a reason. It’s condescending to their own decision making processes and whether or not you turn out to be correct in the end is largely irrelevant.
Maverick behaviour certainly has it’s place but it can be addictive and if it becomes a habit it can be destructive.
What makes something seem like right or wrong action can entirely change depending on your perspective and I think that the only “safe” way to engage in maverick behaviour is to make sure you’ve done your research and that you have the same perspective on the implications of your actions as the person who is telling you “no”.
If you can analyse a situation and truly see that the only reason they’re resisting action is through their inability to gain perspective and not for some other perfectly legitimate reason that they just don’t feel like sharing with you at the moment, go ahead and wreck shop. Don’t take that decision lightly though ;)
Adam Singer replied | Jan 19, 2011 (552 comments)
Cheers for the comment Iain and I agree, the decision to piss someone off shouldn’t be taken lightly and should be done with sound research/data backing up your decision. However, if we need to move egos aside (and upset some) to get the team to success, then so be it. If it costs you a job, you’re with the wrong company IMO – smart companies respect honestly. Don’t just piss people off randomly of course, do so with purpose. I hope I didn’t imply that :)
Stephen Pate replied | Jan 19, 2011 (1 comment)
Sure. You can piss people off, That’s easy. Getting consensus is much harder.
Adam Singer replied | Jan 20, 2011 (552 comments)
One step as a time – it could be the catalyst to eventually reach consensus.
Jon Buscall replied | Jan 20, 2011 (16 comments)
Sure, winding people up can always backfire but I think it’s a good reminder to get out of the safety zone now and then and question things.
The trouble with doing it with words is the lack of the paralinguistic information that can smooth everything over.
Curele Industriale replied | Jan 20, 2011 (1 comment)
But what about never getting a “thank you” when those people you pissed off realize that you did them a favor? When they are so “upset” with you, they won’t admit you did something good? What happens when you come across stubborn persons that won’t accept change even if is for the better?
Adam Singer replied | Jan 20, 2011 (552 comments)
Just knowing you did the right thing is enough. Sometimes a thank you isn’t necessary. People who won’t accept change? Probably get them out of your organization.
Lucy @ VideoCharacter replied | Jan 20, 2011 (8 comments)
If the ideas will prove something good, which will improve someone or something’s ways, then it will be fine to piss the others who think otherwise. Just make sure that, all will be better afterwards.
Ariane replied | Jan 20, 2011 (2 comments)
Thank you for the kick in the pants. It’s true, irreverent blogs are the ones that are followed. Disruptive start-ups are the ones that can knock established companies from their market lead. As the Creative Director of a potentially disruptive start-up, I look forward to pissing people off. Thanks for permission.
Michael replied | Jan 22, 2011 (1 comment)
Pissing people off kind of brings back the old adage “Would you rather be loved or hated as a ruler?”
Now in this case it seems pissing people off would most likely lead them to hate you, and perhaps fear you. Then things would get done. If people loved you they would be inclined to think, “Oh well John will let me get that raise next week.”
So it appears pissing people off is key for being feared.
Angela Giles replied | Jan 24, 2011 (1 comment)
It would be great if people could actually do that. Taking such huge risks with major but miscalculated leaps could be courageous but not at all times a wise thing to do.
-Angela Giles
Social Media and Publicity DIVA